Lyrics

Phoenix

Wearing a helmet but I’m breaking my teeth
Picking roses on a battlefield
My body armoured but I’m breaking my bones
Can’t reach the stars without leaving home

I’d blow up the moon just to turn the tied
What’s good being king if you need to hide
Hiding from myself or hiding from you
Only God knows what I should do

On every corner I see Jesus’ face
Yet nobody knows and nobody cares
We’ve been dying all along
The phoenix rises while we die alone

Like a phoenix I will rise again…

Every morning I find myself
Reinventing the dream that keeps me alive
A ‘tall tale’ story for my heart to beat
So nobody knows my big defeat

Like a phoenix I will rise again…

Attawapiskat

Dragging my empty soul through the hostile street
I’m walking upside down with my head on my feet
It’s like that dream where I can’t move
And when I shout your name you slowly fade away

Every night I have that tunnel vision for dying
I see myself falling apart again

Every night it happens
Every night I die
I wash away the pain with a gun in my hand
I have a thousand dreams so I can fill up that hole
I have a loaded gun for my twisted soul

Every night I have that tunnel vision for dying
I see myself falling apart again

And the gods, they betrayed me
High in the sky, they only laughed at me

I’m shooting arrows to the sky
But what if gods don’t die
Am I shouting at nothing?
Am I living in a lie?

Exorcism

Did I wake the devil,
or you instead?
Did I wake the demons
inside your head?

There never was
a beast under the bed
The monster was waiting
in my head

He’s been lying there for years
tearing me apart
Controlling my thoughts
and the beating of my heart

Let it out…

Did I wake the devil,
or you instead?
Did I wake the demons
inside your head?

Killed by boredom
that fatal disease
Quenching the fire
between the sheets

Corroded heartache
eroded grief
I nail up the door
so you can’t leave

Let it out…
And take it all away…

Already Lost

I’m already lost
I’m already broken
The absence of you
Makes me feel frozen

The story’s untold
The words unwritten
You and me together
Forever forbidden

Will you fall?
Or will you rise?
Will you lead me to paradise?
Will you show me the highest mountain?
Will it turn out fine?

I don’t believe in heaven
But I do believe in you
Even though heaven seems as far away as you
Open your eyes
Can’t you see
I’m yearning for the angel that you used to be

Rome

Dressed to kill but still feeling naked
Black tie, white tie, and faking your smile
Walking the streets of the ancient city
It only took an hour to burn it to the ground

Now watch your move before you enter the void
The concrete will swallow your heart and soul
Get lost in the vacuum of space and time
Watch the Roman soldiers in the neon light

And the city becomes your mind
And your mind becomes the city

And the city is burning down
And your mind becomes a ruin

And the Gods left ages ago
They won’t hear you calling

Ruin after ruin, they built the city
A labyrinth for your soul to lose its way
It’s a ghost town and your mind is on fire
You’re ready to fall dawn just like the Roman Empire

A million souls in a million cars
Stuck in the traffic for a million years
The joke is on you with your head on fire
Lost in the echo of a fallen empire

And the city becomes your mind
And your mind becomes the city

And the city is burning down
And your mind becomes a ruin

And the Gods left ages ago
They won’t hear you calling

An old man’s song
(inspired by ‘De Klacht van den Oude’ by Willem Elsschot)

Can’t get used to getting old
The fire burns deep in my bones
And it haunts me every night.

How I tried to be a better me
Wasted my hole life
Trying to believe

But I have to confess
That I am just a mess
There’s no soul
To fill up that hole

It doesn’t ease my conscious
Singing holy words
Don’t need no country
Don’t need no lord

But for every girl
I would sell my soul
In a life of sin
Is where I begin

I know it’s a crime
But I don’t give a dime
I ditch my house and wife
For a sinners’ life

Falling

Sometimes at night
I feel alone
As if my heart stops beating

Sometimes at night
I feel alone
It feels like falling
Into the deep

Sometimes at night
I see myself
Falling
Into the deep

It feels likes crying
But I’ve got no tears to weep
It feels like dying
Dying in my sleep

My life is on hold
But I keep dreaming
It feels like falling
Into the deep

I’m gonna find my way
Back to the surface
I’m gonna find my way
I’m gonna find you

Hope is for dreamers

When did it start hitting me
Dreams are not meant to be
The man I used to be
Is just a shadow from the past

My hopes and dreams fade away
Midlife crisis comes early today
Something I was hoping for just died

When did I start losing myself
When did I start losing you
When did it start hitting me
Life has no clue

I’m way beyond my highest peak
Midlife crisis comes early this week
Something I was hoping for just died

When did it start hitting me
Dreams are not meant to be
The man I used to be
Is just a shadow from the past

My mind is filled with anger and fear
Midlife crisis comes early this year
Something I was hoping for just died